Jewish Ceremony

Ketubah signing

Ceremony

Convocation:
Welcome! We are gathered here today in the presence of God, family and friends, to join together Missy and Dan in the sacred union of Marriage. We, their families and friends, form that community of love that together we may support and encourage them with our abundance of prayers and blessings on this day and for all their lives.
In a Jewish wedding, The Chuppah – a drape of clothes suspended on four poles, under which the Wedding Blessings are said – is this Sanctuary. Surrounded by loved ones whose joy and prayers are with you, you stand at this chuppah, a symbol of your new home.
Its four sides are open, symbolizing the importance of community and of participation in each other’s lives. Friends and family will fill your home. May your home be a shelter against the storms, a haven of peace, a stronghold of faith and love.

In the Jewish tradition, there is a very special prayer that is said upon reaching a joyous occasion, called the Shehechyanu. The Shehechyanu is said when a baby is born, upon celebrating Holidays, and upon the scared bond of marriage.TheShehechyanu expresses our gratitude for being able to celebrate new occasions. It is our pleasure to now recite the Shehecheyanu:

Blessed are you, creator of the universe, who has given us life, sustained us, and permitted us to celebrate this joyous occasion.
Invocation:
At this time I ask that you all join me in a prayer and blessing for Missy and Dan as they begin the journey on their path of togetherness.
May God bless them and guide them on their journey together.
May their hearts be filled with unconditional love, and understanding and may their continued kindness, compassion, trust and faith in each other, be a constant example of the grace and beauty that the gift of love embodies for all of us.

A moment of remembrance:

We would also like to take a moment to honor those who could not be with us today, Especially: __________

Although death has separated us physically, faith and love have bound us eternally. Though we cannot see you, we know you are here. Though we cannot touch you, we feel the warmth of your smile, as we begin a new chapter in our lives. Today we pause to reflect upon those who have shaped our character, molded our spirits and touched our hearts.
May this moment of silence be a reminder of the memories we have shared; a representation of the everlasting impact you have made upon our lives.

Reading: From the Song of Songs

Address:
There is a passage by Daphne Rose Kingma, called Real Love that I would like to share with you today that exemplifies the importance of love in our lives.
“For it is in loving, as well as in being loved, that we become most truly ourselves. No matter what we do, say, accomplish, or become, it is our capacity to love that ultimately defines us. In the end, nothing we do or say in this lifetime will matter as much as the way we have loved one another.”

Missy and Dan have found the gift of love in each other, they have found in one another other that special person who provides them with peace, love and comfort and who will support each other and share all of life. They have created a love that is simple, effortless, and real, a love that allows them to truly be themselves; they accept all parts of each other with unconditional love and understanding.

Missy and Dan’s journey started 7 years ago. They believe that it was their fate to meet each other on an online dating site.

It has been seven years and throughout this time Missy and Dan’s relationships has evolved through all the joys, challenges and changes of life into this beautiful and loving partnership that you see here before you today as they stand here on the threshold of beginning a new chapter of their relationship by joining their hearts in marriage!

Missy and Dan have invited you here today because you are their dearest family and friends. All of you who Missy and Dan call family, have contributed to who they are, and you will continue to have important place in their lives in the years to come. You have shared with them life most precious moments and again they ask you to share and bear witness to this next chapter of their lives. Missy and Dan would like to send out their heartfelt thanks to you for your continued love, support, and encouragement throughout their lives.

Marriage has always been about family and community. Having you all here with them today is what truly makes their marriage real. To stand before all those we love most in the world, and promise to love another person openly and trustingly, without limits or preconditions, for a lifetime, is perhaps the bravest thing two people will ever do. It is a promise that they have made over and over again in the privacy of their hearts. Missy and Dan would like to send out their heartfelt thanks to you for your continued love, support, and encouragement throughout their lives.

When I met with Dan and Missy, I asked them to tell us about each other, what they loved about each other, what their relationship is like and what is important to them in marriage? What they shared with me and what I could see from talking with them was that over the years they had grown together, and that they complement each other.

But what holds all this together the core of their relationship is the strong love that they have for each other. A love that for each of them comes in many different and amazing ways.

Our couple sent me separate emails with the things they love about each other so this is the first time that they hear it:

(You will hear it on your wedding day)

Together Missy and Dan are best friends and they support and encourage each other every day. They have fun no matter what they are doing either hiking, running, working out, site seeing, going to Shelter Island, watching the leaves change colors, going snowmobiling or snowboarding, or their favorite activity of all time: boating all summer long!
If you want to find Missy and Dan on a weekend during the summer, you should look for them by the water. As long as they are together they are happy and content.
They are a great team, better together than they are apart!

Consecration
Marriage is an honorable estate, instituted in antiquity since all time as most tender of human relationships. It is therefore not to be entered into without much thoughts and consideration.
I ask you both, as you stand in the presence of your family and friends, to remember that love, loyalty and compassion alone will avail as the foundation of a happy and enduring home. No other human ties are more tender, no other vows more sacred than those that you will now assume. If these sacred vows are honored and kept close to your hearts, and you endeavor to always live to the best that is within each of you, your life together will be full of joy, peace and love.

Consent/Intent:
In the presence of God, family and friends, I ask you to state your intentions.
Missy and Dan, have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?
Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?
Missy and Dan respond: I will.

Vows:
Dan: Missy, I love you. You are my best friend. Today I give myself to you in Marriage. I promise to encourage and inspire you, to laugh with you, and to comfort you in time of sorrow and struggle.
I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple and when it is an effort.
I promise to cherish you and to always hold you in the highest regard. These things I give to you today, and all the days of my life.

Missy: Dan, I love you. You are my best friend. Today I give myself to you in Marriage. I promise to encourage and inspire you, to laugh with you, and to comfort you in time of sorrow and struggle.
I promise to love you in good times and in bad, when life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple and when it is an effort.
I promise to cherish you and to always hold you in the highest regard. These things I give to you today, and all the days of my life.
Missy: I do

Blessing of the Rings:
These rings that you will now exchange are a symbol of all the promises that are deep within your hearts that you have shared this day. The circle of these rings stands for the endless cycle of love that begins today and continues throughout your married lives.
They represent to the world your shared gift of love and the commitment you have made to each other this day to share all that is within each of you, the true and beautiful essence of one another.

Exchanging of Rings:

There is no greater statement of devotion in Judaism than “Ani L’Dodi V’Dodi Li” – “I am for my Beloved, and my Beloved is mine”.
With no less a declaration, Missy and Dan will declare their devotion for each other.
Mark, as you placed this ring upon the finger of Melissa , speak to her these vows:
“Missy , I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness with all that I am and all that I will ever be, with these words: ‘I am my beloved and my beloved is mine! Ani L’dodi V’ Dodi Li’.”
Missy, as you placed this ring upon the finger of Dan, speak to him these vows:
Dan, I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness with all that I am and all that I will ever be, with these words: ‘I am my beloved and my beloved is mine! Ani L’dodi V’ Dodi Li’.”

The SHEVA BRACHOT (Seven Blessings)
The following is said under the Chuppah over a full cup of wine or grape juice:

1. ברוך אתה ה’ אלהינו מלך העולם, בורא פרי הגפן .
Blessed is the ruler of the Universe, Creator of the fruit of the vine
2. ברוך אתה ה’ אלהינו מלך העולם, שהכל ברא לכבודו.
Blessed is the glory of all creation.
3. ברוך אתה ה’ אלהינו מלך העולם, יוצר האדם.
Blessed is the creation of the Human Being
4. ברוך אתה ה’ אלהינו מלך העולם, אשר יצר את האדם בצלמו, בצלם דמות תבניתו, והתקין לו ממנו בניין עדי עד. ברוך אתה ה’, יוצר האדם.
Blessed is the design of the Human Being, united in heart and the search for love.
5. שוש תשיש ותגל עקרה, בקיבוץ בניה לתוכה בשמחה. ברוך אתה ה’, משמח ציון בבניה.
Blessed is the joy of our gathering. May rejoicing resound throughout the world as the homeless are given homes, persecution and oppression cease, and all people learn to live in peace with each other and harmony with the earth.
6. שמח תשמח רעים האהובים, כשמחך יצירך בגן עדן מקדם. ברוך אתה ה’, משמח חתן וכלה.
Let these loving companions rejoice. May their joy be as paradise on earth.
7. ברוך אתה ה’ אלהינו מלך העולם, אשר ברא ששון ושמחה, חתן וכלה, גילה רינה, דיצה וחדווה, אהבה ואחווה, ושלום ורעות, מהרה ה’ אלקינו ישמע בערי יהודה ובחוצות ירושלים, קול ששון וקול שמחה, קול חתן וקול כלה, קול מצהלות חתנים מחופתם, ונערים ממשתה נגינתם. ברוך אתה ה’, משמח חתן עם הכלה.
Blessed is the creation of joy and celebration, Bride and Groom, delight and cheer, love and solidarity, peace and companionship. Blessed and praised is this love and this marriage.

ברוך אתה ה’ אלוהינו מלך העולם בורא פרי הגפן

Wedding Blessing
So many gifts we are offered today. The gift of bearing witness the union of Missy and Dan, to their love and commitment they have express in the presence of God and their families and friends. We wish them all the happiness the world has to offer and bless them throughout their lives together. May you never take each other for granted but always experience the wonders of your union.
May your love consist not only in gazing into each other’s eyes, but also in looking outward in the same direction. May your life together be a source of strength and inspiration to yourselves, your families and your friends. May you never forget the beginning of your love for one another, take care of it, nurture it, and allow it to grow strong and firm in the years that are to come. May you always concentrate on making each other happy and secure in your commitment to one another and always rely on your ability to keep the promises you have made to one another today throughout the thick and thin of life’s experiences. And may you always be in love. May your love be as beautiful each day you share as it is on this day of Your Wedding and may all of your wishes come true.

Breaking of the glass explanation: Rabbi Sara

Missy and Dan have chosen to honor a tradition that is a part of their heritage; the breaking of the glass. It is a time-honored tradition in the Jewish Faith.
There are many symbolic meaning to this ritual, but today we envision the breaking of the glass as the shattering of your old lives, your individual path, to start a new path together, a new beginning!! “For those of you witnessing this for the first time it is appropriate to clap, yell, or shout Mazal Tov! when the glass is broken.”

Priestly blessing: (Missy and Dan are wrapped in a Talit)
יְבָרֶכְךָ יהוה וְיִשְׁמְרֶךָ:

May the Lord Bless you and guide you

יָאֵר יהוה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ וִיחֻנֶּךָּ

May the Lord shine his face upon you and be gracious to you

יִשָּׂא יהוה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ
וְיָשֵׂם לְךָ שָׁלוֹם:

May the Lord lift up his face to you and give to you peace.

Pronouncement of Marriage:
Dan and Missy, you have showered our hearts with expressions of your love, and promised each other the joy of all your days, it gives me great honor and pleasure to now pronounce you husband and wife.

Breaking of Glass

The Kiss:
You may now kiss your beautiful bride

Sara Shonfeld - Rabbi & Interfaith Officiant Reviews